what is my abundance barrier?

"You are confined only by the walls you build yourself."

Uncovering a truth requires courage and the willingness to go deep into areas within us that we haven't traversed or have restricted ourselves from doing so. When you open the doors to that which you resist, you'll find that you have unlocked the first door to the barrier itself. There's this abundance barrier that is holding me back from experiencing myself in a profound way & not letting others experience me in my unique ways. As I block this, I too block myself from creating what I am meant to create.

WE ARE MORE THAN WHAT WE HAVE EVEN EXPERIENCED OF US
This life is not just about waking up everyday and performing the tasks that we have laid down for ourselves but doing; let me scrap doing but being more of who we truly are. We are at the core beyond our possibilities, beyond our vision, beyond our thoughts, beyond our limitations. We are extraordinary, we are love, we are pure, we are abundant, we are more than what we have even experienced of us.There's so much to experience ourselves in us that this life-time will fall short. As I grew in my life, I have uncovered beautiful parts inside of me, parts unknown to me & also parts that looked seemingly not so good to me but was there to tell me that it is important to experience both sides of the coin to be able to arrive at a point of nothingness, a space of absolute infiniteness. The space between the extremes, the space between the polarities, because to experience that space, you have to be awakened to even sense its presence.

For a greater part of my life, I lived in black & white. I lived in this or that, on or off, because I wasn't even aware that something in between existed because this awareness is very unique to every individual based on his/her growth journey. I am not sure what & why I am writing all of these. But yes, I am letting myself flow, I am enabling my thoughts to flow and uncover an abundance barrier that is holding me back for long and I find many people including my clients having this barrier, unable to break-free from it. So this blog is an attempt to uncover that barrier. I have realized that when you let your thoughts flow, feel the underlying emotion in it and just sit with it with the quest to uncover the message, you get the message, the answer that you are looking for.

THE UNIVERSE IS ABUNDANT ONLY IF WE ARE WILLING TO EXPERIENCE IT
Anything that we restrict in us and don't allow to flow & obstruct the Universe's flow of energy is where we get stuck. Abundance is the natural flow. The Universe is abundant only if we are willing to experience it. We choose to be in the scarcity space because that's what we have experienced, that's what most of us have been conditioned to accept, that's what takes us to the victim mode paving the way for sympathy & excuses which we like & dislike too. A thought is coming to my mind but I am feeling vulnerable to share it here. And I know that this is the right moment to share because this resistance will uncover something that will serve me. So, here it is: I grew up in a middle class family and my parents gave us the best that they could. Today I am all because of the foundation that was laid then. So, I sit in this deep gratitude of that experience. Yet, there are parts in me that is looking for answers, unresolved issues around abundance that needs resolution. And here I am to unlock my abundance barrier. Two questions that I asked myself since the abundance barrier is not serving me anymore are:

1. What is the abundance barrier trying to teach me that I haven't learnt over these years?
2. What message is it giving that I have been ignoring for years?

What came up for me are these revelations! Deep down I believe all of these: I don't deserve abundance. I am not important enough to experience abundance. In the experience of scarcity my deeper needs of being accepted, loved, valued unconditionally are met. And because of which I had restricted myself from experiencing abundance. I never allowed myself to embrace it, but kept on deflecting it whenever it wanted to embrace me. As a result of which, I couldn't experience the joy of being in the nothingness of this experience. I just tasted one side of the coin and never allowed myself to taste the other side thinking that this is what it is. I kept imagining what the other side would look like & kept judging, conceptualizing, restricting myself from experiencing that out of sheer fear to plunge to the other side. This awareness is enough for me to create a new awareness in me to enable me to experience the other side, allowing the energy to flow & enabling the abundance barrier to break. I already feel from the inside that the barrier is breaking now.

We think that abundance means having lots of money, huge bank balance, surplus income etc. But in reality abundance is beyond all of these. Abundance is the feeling of fullness, feeling of having everything, feeling of bliss, joy, feeling of resourcefulness, feeling of the power within us to create & manifest. When we get access to that power within, we automatically elevate ourselves from a space of lack, emptiness, scarcity to a space of resourcefulness. Abundance can be felt when we get in touch with the gold mine that is hidden inside us and now it is up to us as to how we want to use it. Getting into that space requires deep belief that we deserve to live in abundance and that abundance lies in us & not outside us. You can earn more money, yet feel lack & scarce. You can have everything yet feel empty & incomplete. Abundance comes from the acceptance of these facts: I am worthy of this feeling. I have faith in my resourcefulness. I approve of the abundance that is already there in my life. I approve of the abundance in me. I am not pulling myself down to scarcity in my thoughts, emotions & actions but elevating myself to experience abundance, a blissful state to be in. When the little voice inside us says: "Yes, I have everything, I am full, complete and powerful enough to create what is important to me", is when you truly embrace abundance. You break free from your barrier and you are a step closer to your experience of life. Why did I even mention that I belonged to a middle-class family?! Because generally we are conditioned to belief that a normal middle-class family doesn't live much of their lives in abundance state but scarcity state. That is what we have been conditioned to believe. But the actual experience would be to not accept what is generally downloaded to you but what you experience what the reality is. Being in middle-class family doesn't mean living in scarcity, it is just the conditioned mind that restricts the experience of the abundance gold mine that is there in us. Once that is broken free, abundance will flow through every person, every being. It's a matter of sheer experience unique to self! 

OUR CHOICE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE
An insight is a new way of looking at things. You then club it with your learning, learning from other sources and make a powerful perspective for you. That's the beginning of any journey. Once you are aware of your abundance barrier, you got to ask yourself: What do you want to do about it? You want to use it to experience yourself in a more profound way or you want to remain who you are, in a cautious space not wanting to expand & bloom? The choice is entirely yours and that choice makes all the difference. Leaving you with a thought provoking quote by J K Rowling, "It is impossible to live without failing at something...unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all-in which case you fail by default."

Love, light & gratitude,
Priyanka