We often spend more time wanting to be heard & less in listening. We want others to listen to our stories, our thoughts, our ideas. Being heard makes us feel great. It gives us a sense of being important in the eyes of the person listening to us. We feel valued and loved.
Imagine then what the impact of deep & curious listening would have on the other person. Apart from everything mentioned above, it enables the speaker to use his/her mind in a much better way because there is no distraction from the listener, it enables natural flow of thoughts which eventually leads to better understanding & processing of emotions resulting in better conversational outcomes. The power is profound and so it the opposite of not doing this.
Many relationships shatter, friendships break, loved ones get hurt because of being misunderstood which stems from not listening deeply. At this age when people have gone into a default mode of proving one's expertise, one's wisdom over others; listening has become a forgotten & a much sought after skill. Yes, it is becoming extinct.
I invite you to give your undivided, committed & deep listening to just one person everyday & reflect on how this made you feel. Most importantly, how connected you felt with that person after you gave them your committed, curious & deep listening. So, whom would you start with? Your spouse, your child, your friend, your colleague, your parent or even you? Gift them your power to exuberate in your silence.
Life & Organizational Development Coach